Does anyone else feel this way?

you really are in my head, i did the same thing when i bought my size 4 (well small) leggings. they sat in their packaging for weeks before i could convince myself that they weren't an "I'll fit in them eventually"i think i even posted about that head trip on here

glad you got the positive reinforcement you deserved!!!

i can image a 0 feeling very surreal... wow, that's insanity, congratulations!

3 years?! i might be a mental wreck by then! hopefully since i was a fast loser i'll be a fast catch up person? probably the opposite will be true.

this time last year, i was 100 pounds or more heavier as well (visits from mom pack on pounds, even during a doctor supervised diet!). sometimes i have to stop and think... my son weighs 33 pounds, and I used to carry around 3 of him, GOODNESS!

Your post hit right on a nerve.  I bought some tight work out capris to wear if I jog and then I bought some shorts to go over them because I said I would never go out in public with just the tight capris on.  Yesterday when I got home and we were going to walk I thought about putting them on and then thought that everyone would be staring at me thinking how ridiculous I look so I put my baggy shorts on and went walking!!

I do wear some tight jeans now.  But everytime I take my clothes out of the dryer I think, I might as well give these away because there is no way I'll get in them!!

Others are probably seeing you as a normal looking person.  I think all of our issues with looks and thoughts of what other people think are in our heads!!

Just know that you are not alone in this struggle.

Linda

hehe, i was the opposite last week. I had bought new gym shorts, but they seemed awful short, so i wore my bike shorts underneath them, and i felt stupid, good thing my circuit is a mere half hour! not sure which i will drop next time i need shorts, but i can't do both, i felt over dressed and like an idiot.

i look forward to your brain catching up with your body almost as much i do for me!

Nah, they all knew me fat here. I've worked at the same company off and on for 11 years. THey met me at 190 pounds, saw me go down to 180, watched my pregnancy, saw me balloon to 250 pounds and drop down to 229, and watched the steady drop since then. every day people tell me to stop losing weight (it's getting annoying). but i don't deny that today is probably completely just in my head. this is how thin people dress, i know it, i've seen it, but i'm not used to being there. like on my husbands birthday, we were at his mom's house with two of his friends, she said the smallest person should sit in a particular chair. no one claimed it. that was when i realized i was the smallest person in the room, talk about a head trip!

thank you so much for sharing, responding and letting em know that i am not alone in this

I have a thing about having fat legs...so I never wore skirts...my DH said I looked nice in them so I started adding them to my work wear...I had a dirty little secret--I never dressed in a skirt any time we had a group meeting, just the days I knew I would be office bound.  I completely and utter freaked out one day when I had on a skirt and we had a very large group meeting.  I wanted to die.  My co-workers never saw the old heavy me (I started a new job when I was about 7 months out)..so I was a tad heavy but not anything super noticeable.  Anyways a woman who became my good friend was present for the freak out because she reminded me of the meeting.  She was like WTF- I explained- I never ever wanted to be the fat person in the room or the skinny person...I just wanted to blend and I didn't want anyone really noticing me.  She was supportive of me, but told me I was being insane in her nice friend way.  She never has really understood it- it was just my thing.  I have gotten over it some- but still find I hide my legs and arms as much as possible.  I was even able to wear knee boots so I know my legs were not super over weight-but that is what I saw when I looked at them. We all have our craziness and some of it gets better and some of it never goes away-  But in a size small nothing you have is fat or so unsightly someone would need to comment. 

I remember thinking people were analyzing me, and talking about me----turns out some of them were---but in a hey baby kind of way. LOL My DH pointed it out...some man was looking at my butt- all I could think were those old thoughts- my jeans are too tight, I look like an over sized load--- but my husband was like did you see that guy eying your ass? (in a really loud way so the guy knew I was with someone)...He laughed and said- told you-you look good. I think that is when I finally excepted people were not being mean, I was just getting noticed.  I can say it is starting to happen again..now it cracks me up.  I walked into the car dealership in my dress outfit, and the guy at the reception desk had just answered the phone---he was literally yelling at the person to hold (hold a minute, hold , please hold one minute.he was saying to the person on the line), but they kept talking, he was in a panic to ask me what I needed...LOL I knew my way so I just kept going...but it was funny.  I guess they don't see to many 'pretty' women in 4 inch sexy heels stroll into their service department. 

It will take a while but you will grow to accept the looks, the whispers and learn not to really care anymore...besides 99% of it is positive. 

thank you for sharing your story, i can definately understand your feelings!
i always saw my legs and uber muscular, but they are suddenly less firm due to some loose skin. I'll tighten it up and deal (so weird to be able to not only say but BELIEVE that)
but what i most identify with from your story is a deisre to be normal. Not the fat girl, not that skinny chick, i just want to be me, a healthy me, but me at the core.

i had to get some papers from my boss about an hour ago and she didn't send me home, so it's all in my head. whew.

thanks again for sharing your story with me, i do feel a lot better

I know for myself, there are still days I cant wrap my head around my body size. I put on pants everyday that I think are too small and they are getting baggy now!

Somedays I still feel like that fat girl that couldnt wear anything stylish, but on other days I feel more adventurous and with my hubby's prodding do wear some form fitting clothing.

I am a nurse so my uniform is my work outfit. I dont have to worry about what I wear.

You are not fake, just in a new form that you are not quite used to yet. As am I.

hugs

just another part of this wacky journey. better to be healthy and a little crazy than unhappy adn miserable is my new philosophy :)

I wish you the very best and a fun time on your journey

I was at Wal Mart looking for some leggings in a size Med and all they had were Small so I bought them but never wore them. My daughter wore them. A few weeks ago I decided to try them on and they fit so I was going to wear them out. I got in my car and drove down the street and turned around and went home to change. I just didn't feel comfortable in them.
I am still wearing my pre op pants I have worn for years. They range from Med to XL. I finally got rid of my 2X pants since they wouldn't stay up. They are comfortable. I bought some jeans on my way down, mainly to gauge my weight loss. I started with a size 12, I think. I would buy a pair of 12 and a pair of 10s. When the 12s got big I put on the 10s to see if they fit. Once they fit I bought some more and a size 8. The last pair I bought was 5, at the Goodwill outlet. I just grabbed any jeans they had around size 6. The 5s fit but they are very low cut. I think if they had to zip up more then 2 inches they wouldn't fit.
Now I haven't worn any jeans in a few weeks because of my hernia and the surgery.
I have bought very few tops since I still had some hidden away from my first WLS. I still wear Large because of my boobs.
Someone said it takes 3 years for the mind to catch up? I don't think I have ever been in the same size for 3 years straight in my life. To me, that will be a victory. I feel like I need to enjoy it while it lasts because it never does. Maintenance is my challenge. I really thought I would never have to worry about it again with my first WLS. I saw so many successful people who had the surgery and were still a normal BMI years later that I thought my years of obesity were over. I never maintained my weight loss but I stayed a normal size for about 5 years. I regained about 10 lbs a year after my lowest of 120lbs at 2 years out. At 3 years out I weighed about 135lbs. At four years out I weighed about 145 lbs. At 5 years out I weighed about 155 lbs. By 6 years out it was really coming on. I got up to about 185lbs and went on a diet. I managed to lose some weight and got down to 150lbs and stayed there for a while until I pretty much snapped and started eating what ever I wanted. That was at the beginning of 2009. A year later, in the beginning of 2010 I weighed about 195lbs and 7 months later, when I had my revision I was 218lbs. So I have been very unstable in my maintenance. It's hard to feel secure in my body when my history is not to stay thin for any amount of time.

awwh, i can totally imagine doing that. you need to wear what makes YOU comfortable, I guess otherwise you'll end up a basket case like i did yesterday.
today i am completely confident in my clothing and even have a bounce in my step, it doesn't hurt that today is my friday...
i think your progress by pants size sounds like a wonderful idea and a great way to go through your sizes!

how are you receovering from your surgery?

the boob faerie came and took mine back, which is the only reason I can fit in small tops now.

maybe it takes 3 years of staying the same size to make your brain really get it? i wore a 13 for 8 years, i identified with that size, not fitting in it after pregnancy threw me, then shrinking out of it after WLS was another identity crisis.

wishing i were more patient because i know this will take time to become my new normal. buying new clothes drives it home, but that would get expensive even at goodwill and outlet stores...

i do hope that maintenance becomes easier for you, more of a way of life than a chore. sending happy hopeful thoughts your way

Thank you.  You look great.  Enjoy  it :)
I am doing ok after my surgery.  I was feeling pretty weak and tired but I have stopped the pain meds and that helps.